Helping Your Child Express Big Feelings in Healthy Ways
Helping Your Child Express Big Feelings in Healthy Ways
Preschoolers experience a huge range of emotions every day — joy, frustration, excitement, sadness, fear, and everything in between. Learning how to handle these “big feelings” is an important part of growing up, but it’s not always easy for little ones (or their parents!).
Here’s how you can help your child understand and express their emotions in healthy, positive ways.
1. Name the Feelings
Children often act out when they don’t have the words to describe how they feel. You can help by putting their emotions into words:
“You look really sad that it’s time to leave the playground.”
“I can see you’re frustrated because the blocks keep falling.”
When children hear you name emotions, they start to recognize and label their own — an early step in developing emotional intelligence.
2. Listen and Validate
Sometimes all a child needs is to feel heard. Instead of jumping straight to problem-solving, try listening first:
“That must have felt really hard.”
“I understand you’re upset — I get upset sometimes too.”
Validation helps children feel safe and teaches them that all feelings are okay — it’s the actions that matter.
3. Teach Healthy Ways to Cope
Once your child feels calm, talk about what they can do next time those big feelings come up. You can model or practice simple strategies like:
- Taking deep breaths (“Smell the flower, blow out the candle”)
- Hugging a stuffed animal
- Drawing a picture about what happened
- Asking for a cuddle or help
These coping tools help children manage emotions instead of being overwhelmed by them.
4. Model Emotional Expression
Children learn from what they see. When you calmly express your own feelings, you’re showing your child how to handle emotions in a healthy way:
“I’m feeling frustrated right now, so I’m going to take a deep breath.”
This teaches them that it’s okay to have big emotions — and that there are calm, respectful ways to deal with them.
5. Praise Positive Efforts
When your child expresses a feeling appropriately (“I’m mad!” instead of hitting), notice it and praise it:
“I love how you told me you were angry with your words.”
Positive reinforcement helps those healthy habits stick and builds confidence in managing emotions.
Remember
Every child develops emotional skills at their own pace. What matters most is creating a calm, loving environment where they feel safe to express themselves — the good, the bad, and everything in between. With your patience and support, they’ll learn that all feelings are okay, and there’s always a healthy way to express them.
If you'd like more support or specific strategies for your child, please talk to your child’s teacher. We’re here to help and can suggest activities or ideas tailored to your child’s needs.
